Assessment: Professor Icognito

In what I read of the passage I feel it's read as an email (i.e the headers "RE:"). I don't know if I would consider it a symbol, but it goes hand in hand with the apology and the Professor's character. I find emails to be rather methodical, and associate his use of it as a form of communication to fit him perfectly. It's also different than speaking in person. You are hiding a part of you when sending an email. The recipient, in this case the reader, isn't able to see the Professor. We aren't able to see the real him, just like his lover was shown a different side of him.

I felt a connection more towards the person he is talking to in his passages. It was more so on how the reader is at a point in which they lived a happy couple life to find out their lover had a double life and practically lied about their persona. I was in a relationship in which the person I dated felt the need to change their character to impress others and make friends. Also the way this is written is like a similar experience I have had the past few days in which my ex has reached out to me. It may seem heartfelt on the outside, however, I feel with some of the points he makes (falling asleep on her shoulder and dreaming of creating other means of destruction). It is an apology but it's not heartfelt. It's mechanical.

I think this would work extremely well as a short film. Something in which it's more of a video recording, rather than a passage. Especially if it were recorded of their time together. To see his character progress throughout their time together would be a better way of story telling, rather than telling us how he felt after all these events happened. The viewer would be able to really understand his character better with this device.

The inspiration of Anime

The thing about anime is that many of us who love it often like to hide it from those who don't know it/hate it. Many artists shun it and believe it not to be an art style or something to really inspire one. The argument mainly revolves around the fact that if you "aren't Japanese" that you shouldn't be drawing anime/manga. People associate the style with a specific race therefore it must only be for said race. The thing is, many of us are so inspired by anime and manga. Hell, most of us probably drew it not too long ago.

The above image is from Bee and Puppycat, a cartoon about a girl and a mysterious cat who can transform her into "magical girl" to fight or help creatures of other dimensions. Natasha Allegri was actually a storyboard artist for Adventure Time and you can even see in the art on her blog the love for bows is clearly shown. What is it about bows? It's commonly seen both in magical girl transformations and their "costumes". We also get a glimpse of Puppycat's past in lullaby about a Space Outlaw who loved Princess and planned to run away with her. When he went to meet her, it was a trap and he was cursed by the Space King's army of warlocks and was turned into a monster instead of just being trapped. 

There is even a French anime called "LoliRock" that has the theme of magical girls. It's definitely a theme that many of us gravitate towards, specifically females. We grew up watching Sailor Moon, wishing that one day we would be chosen to save the world from other worldly creatures while transforming into a cute outfit. It was every girls dream. LoliRock follows a similar style of shows like Sailor Moon and Mermaid Melody. The main character is a normal girl who happens to be a princess of another world. She loves to sing and goes to an audition to be the new member of the band LoliRock. Little does she know, the 2 members are also princesses and she's thrown into a confrontation right after meeting them. 

I think using Anime to inspire artists isn't bad. It's not something to be taught in schools, though. I think if people want to like and be inspired by these works, they would do so on their own. We grow up taking in things we watch constantly, things that we don't always learn about in school. 

Being a Fan

Most people like to think about Bronies or Superwholocks when they hear the word "fandom". The ones that get butt-hurt if you talk bad about their beloved show. Even will try to threaten you, which is both hilarious and totally uncalled for. Think i'm lying? Look at the image below:

And it keeps going. It's actually like that in any fandom, no matter the size. However, one can say that there are groups within these fandoms. I like to classify them as follows: the outsiders, the lovers, and the fans.

The Outsiders: Those who sit on the outskirts and look in. They tend to keep their opinions on subjects within the fandom to a minimum but will often showcase their love when it is brought up in conversation. 

The Lovers: The ones that love every aspect of the fandom. Mainly those that wright fanfiction and/or draw fanart. A few items in their room are from the show, such as posters, jewelry, apparel, appliances, etc. Maybe a tattoo? They aren't in the closet about their love for the work. I feel cosplayers would also be included in this group, but that can vary.

The (super) Fans: Now I bet you feel this one would be similar to the lovers of the fandom. Sorry, but that's not the case. I feel fans are the worst of a fandom. They eat, sleep, and shit their favorite show/game/etc.. They honestly live it. It's like you took the lover group and gave them cocaine. If their opinion isn't considered canon or even believed, they will throw a temper tantrum. 

A great example is my experience as a Bioware fan. Well, lover in the above case. I love Mass Effect, and eventually got into Dragon Age last year. The thing is I would consider myself also an outsider. I've seen people get pissy about their not being more gay/bi characters in the game. Let me pull back for a bit. In both games you take on the role of a customizable (or default) character. You can be Male or Female and have the option to romance one of the many characters in the game. Sounds fun, right? Well it is. You get sucked into this world and fall in love with these gorgeous characters that Bioware has created. I have about 8 characters made in Dragon Age: Inquisition. 

Anyway, some of the characters swing one way or keep their options open. In the first games it seemed to be more about having a female or male only option and then a bisexual character. In Dragon Age 2, all characters were bisexual besides one, who was a female only dlc. The only problem was that I didn't really feel the need to replay the game. I could just have multiple saves in which my same character ended up with the romance choices. Which is sad, as personally I would love to replay it. Not saying I wouldn't. These games have multiple decisions that need to be made that shape your gameplay. However, with the Dragon Age Keep, I'm able to change these decisions with a single click. 

I'm getting a bit off topic now. 

Both these games are playable on PC, which opens up to the lovely add ons called mods. Ah yes. Want to run around naked? mods. Want dragons to be Thomas the Tank Engine? mods. Want your non-caucasian characters to have whiter skin? mods. 

What? Why would you want to change your characters skin? The same reason why there are mods to make the male party members butt's jiggle. People want to. Of course, you can still get these mods and those in the fandom tend to just ignore the fact that they exist. However, once a mod came out for Inquisition to make a female character roman-cable for a female protagonist, the fandom went wild. People sent threats to the creator and those that supported the mod. How horrible of someone to do such a thing! Eventually the creator deleted the mod and their tumblr blog. That didn't stop some from posting it for those that missed out. But why couldn't the fandom just ignore it if they didn't like it? People like to ruin fun for others. 

Then there were those that actually hounded the game's lead writer, David Gaider, about why a male character wasn't available for males. They believed he had a thing with the gay character because of one scene in which they play chess. That makes total sense. The writer left it vague with a simple "because we didn't feel it fit his character" or something along the lines. That didn't go well with those who were all for having him gay. People kept attacking the employees for a further explanation. Saying that it's simple to change the sexual orientation of a character. Then that led to attacking others in the fandom for not liking the idea... The list of things the fandom bicker about goes on.

What I learned from these moments is that if you don't like something one side of the fandom is doing, ignore it. Don't push your opinions onto others who think the opposite. I stay quiet about the things I don't like in the fandom unless it's something that actually deals with the story. I could care less if someone hates the game. I got a few friends into series. However, I also advise people to actually play the whole series. That's the only time i've forced my opinion onto another, and they didn't take it. There were other things I advised them about when they were getting their PS4, but I still hound them about playing the series instead of the latest game just because the graphics and (concept) art looks amazing. Especially since it's a game based on choices you made in the previous 2 installments. 

New Age Comics

Comics have become a big fad recently, especially with the release of comic book films such as X-Men, The Avengers, and The Dark Knight Series. We see new characterizations of beloved characters that have become much more modern. We now have a muslim Ms. Marvel, a black Spiderman and Captain America, and even gay marriage. If you walked into a comic book store, you would see a variety of styles, stories, and genres. Not to say those weren't around before, but it's not just DC, Marvel, and Archie plastered around the walls.

One series example is Saga.

If you haven't read it yet, you're honestly missing out.

Now, I religiously go to the comic book store now to get my copy of this comic. I'm in love with it. Hell, I'm planning to cosplay Alana, the woman with the teal/black hair below. I even made a wallet out of Chapter 15.

It's a wonderful story from the narration of a child about her journey and the war between her parent's species. It's got love, death, and great characters that pulls you in instantly. Even with it's sci-fi themes, it has a very real story.

There are very mature themes but that's what's so great about it. It doesn't censor itself. We see the love between Marko and Alana and the obstacles they confront together. We see their baby grow up slowly (now in her toddler stage) and often given hints to events in the future. I was happy to hear Marko's mother is still alive in the future. However, especially at the recent events in the series, I'm afraid for Alana. There have already been deaths of characters a few issues after their first appearance.

Fiona Staples art is just amazing, as well.

She's even now doing the art for the Archie reboot, which can be seen below. I'm excited to see this new look of Archie in action. If you're interested, it comes out in July.

I proceeded to read She-Hulk to issue #3, because I hadn't been able to get #4. It's a series I've been wanting to read for some time now. I mean, who doesn't love She-Hulk? It was interesting to see her own story unfold as she quits her job and creates her own agency. She deals with cases that still connect to her superhero line of work. We get the woman filing a case against Tony Stark and the son of Doctor Doom, who wants become a citizen of the US and abandon Lazeria. She doesn't want to use her strength but always ends up needing to fight her way to her goal.

Will update this blog post later.

The Modern Hipster

So what exactly is a Hipster?

How do we define them? After a quick search on Google this pops up:

But is this a Hipster? 

Technically, yes. However, it's our modern view on a stereotype. If you search Jock, Goth, or Nerd, you will see stereotypical views of these types of people. We see them as an artsy mix of different groups. They are ahead of the game in fashion, movies, music, etc. They just always seem to like something "before it was cool" or "you've probably never heard of it". They've honestly become a joke.

Here's a song to get you into the mindset of a Hipster: The Electric Guest - This Head I Hold

Or How About Vampire Weekend - Ya Hey ?

Below is a visualization on the modern Hipster. Notice that I keep saying modern.

The thing is... A lot of people could be considered a Hipster. It doesn't just mean you dress like a Lumberjack or love Vintage things. No. It is a melting pot. There are such things as Hipster-Jocks, Hipster-Goths, etc. 

Rants and Writings

There's things that really piss me off. The sounds people make when they chew, slow drivers, rain. But nothing get's me more than those who don't offer help when you need it most. When you actually reach out to someone believing you can trust them, only to have them turn their back to you. That phrase they say keeps being told to you repeatedly that it begins to blur and numb you. You don't want to say anything because you fear of hurting them. Of losing a friend when you have so few.

"You do you"

it plays throughout my day. Haunting me. It always feels like a let down and I'm unsure of how to feel about this. They always give a weak laugh after they say it, like they know. Sometimes I say it back rudely. I want to show them that what they say isn't helpful. It's irritating. As someone who has trouble with making decisions and has anxiety attacks often, you not being there when I reach out shows me that no one cares. No one wants to hear your shit. They want to talk about their self and that's all. It's sickening. But I need friends.

This has become a venting ground I guess. Don't think anything wrong of me, it's taking courage to write this, let alone post this. It's just something I need to get off my chest. She's a good person.

It just sucks because I go out of my way to help her. I drive her to places.

It just sucks when she laughs when i'm being serious. Do you not see that i'm getting upset?

It just sucks that I feel she is using me. We went to see a show together. She didn't pay. She hasn't payed for gas but got me cheap dinner. Does that count?

It just sucks when she ignores things I say. Do I speak to soft? But when I don't I get told i'm too loud. But I have to hear everything you say. Is that fair?

It just sucks that I can't be open about it to her face. Instead I reserve myself into a little bubble.

But I love that I keep trying.

I love that I don't give up on my dreams. That I don't hold grudges.

I love that I can get past things. It may take time to heal but it's worth it. I've been hurt by so many "friends" I don't know who to trust anymore.

I love that I care. I care too much but I care. Not a lot can say that.

I love my smile. I don't want it to ever go away. My laugh is always there. I laugh at the smallest jokes and find it beautiful.

People stop to ask my sometimes "Why are you laughing?" In which a laugh always escapes my lips first before I try to say "I don't know."

I remember a lady stopped me on campus. She looked young but was in her 30's I believe. She was looking for an event and stopped me to chat. She seemed really interested in what I had to say about school, life. It was something I cherished, when others would have walked away. She talked to me for a while, wanting to know about me. I was confused. I'm not used to that. She then stopped after a half hour or so and asked me if she could let me in on something. She likes to get to know people and she asked if I would like an assessment of sorts on what she read from me. She said she can tell I really care for people. That I go out of my way for others. That God is watching over me. There was something about my future that I can't fully remember but I do know I was holding back tears. I don't really believe in God as much as I used to but I still consider myself religious in sorts. It was nice to hear this from a stranger who invited me to tell my story in a way. I remember saying that I'm glad she saw that in me, as it was something I was striving to accomplish but never saw in myself. Before she left she asked if I had any pain. I said my shoulder. She then proceeded to pray the pain away. Of course, she asked first. I had been talking to here for about an hour now. I was actually waiting for the friend I was talking about previously. The pain was gone and so was she.

I'm not really intimate though. I'm not the romantic sort. Hell, I hate making out. Sometimes even kissing makes me sick. I don't know what to identify as though.

I call myself Asexual. Am I really?

I just say I don't know, now. It's easier. But when it comes to some people, I willingly open up and say that I am. Normally, they know what it means beforehand and I don't have to tell them what it means and why I feel like it. It's embarrassing at the same time. Everyone around me talks about sex, my roommate goes out of her way to meet people from Tinder or OK Cupid and has sex with them. One night stands. I tried this once... I say once because I want to forget the first time I hooked up with someone after the break-up. It was strange. I don't know what to say really. But I do remember feel awkward. Not being in the mood. Feeling like a piece of wood laying there. Is it weird?

I find safety in video games.

I escape reality to fight monsters, make choices, and love characters who return it. I rather play them all day if I could. As someone who is indecisive in real life, It's a wonder how I can make choices so easily. But sometimes I have to know the outcomes of the choices before choosing. That's what sucks about real life. There is no walkthrough.

When I get really sad I like to play my games. I've been attached to the Dragon Age series lately. Mainly because I get to create my own character and live another life. I got 2 friends into it. One shelled out over $500 for a PS4 and 2 games. She wanted to "Get into games". Cool. I kept telling her to play the first 2 instead of getting the recent game but her reasoning is "She can look it up. She didn't want to spend the money on 2 more games. She liked the art." I still hound her on it. I wish I stopped her from buying the PS4. I wish I tried harder. She annoys me.

The other was the friend I spoke of in the beginning. She's actually playing the first of the series, thankfully. However, she too made the comment of "I love the art". She wanted to buy an artbook. Me and another friend of hers said not to right now because It would contain spoilers.

She still bought it.

100,000 Kingdoms

For what little I read of the first of a trilogy, It was definitely something I wouldn't finish. It has the same plot as most young adult novels with fancy names. The typical, main female character is thrown into something they don't care for and it seems like everyone is out to get them in one way or another. Examples being how the 2 other heirs are trying to kill her, all the Arani (?) hate her, and the gods want to help her for a price. Then the reason to go to Sky was to figure out her mothers murder. So, at least there's a lot going on in the story... For not getting far, I do wonder if she resolves all the questions it opened.

Then the whole thing with the Nahadoth and how he was chasing her but then kisses her before he "dies" was where I had to draw the line. I even did some research and found out it was originally called "The Sky-God's Lover". So you can already guess what one of the plot points are. As much as I love fantasy, this wasn't my cup of tea. I enjoyed Divergent more than this one, actually. Especially since the main characters always have more to offer in the end because of some connection.

But thinking of it as a young adult reader who is eager to read something with magic, action, and romance, then this is a good read. It's like fanfiction, where it's just a guilty pleasure that young readers can enjoy. It's not bad, in fact it is written better than most young adult novels I have read. The concept, however, is very cliché no matter how much she dresses it up.